I LEAVE TO FORGET
Remind me of the past that I'm about to forget,
If I'm living an endless present, from where will I
learn and regret?
I leave to forget and I forget to give myself a reason
to come back. If my past is gone, how am I going to find
my way home.
Lightning strikes, lights fill the shadows
of this once empty room. A dark cave waiting to be
lit my memories.
I leave to forget and forget why I left in the first
place. If my past must die the instant I'm born, where
will my future come from?
Killing the shadows, that's how I control the sadness
of a head once filled with unforgettable memories.
Posted at
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12:20 AM
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August 30, 2004
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Jose
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I'm finding a road, all withered & forgotten,
a road that will take me exactly where I want to be.
Far away from here.
I'm arriving alone, but I will be joined by someone before long.
Caged inside my hollow cube, there will only enough space for someone like you.
I'm looking up a hill, dense in brush & darkness,
my feet run over it & before I ask myself why I started
running, I realize, you are on the other side.
I'm waiting without company to be held, I'm waiting here until we can
call all this "home".
Caged in another country, there are only so many places for you & me.
It's when I try to talk that I seem to forget what we
were talking about.
I'm lost in more of your things than just your eyes.
Posted at
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10:49 AM
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August 28, 2004
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Posted by
Jose
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Almost a month now after my last post, I'm happy to announce that my new place of residence has changed from being in Guadalajara, Jalisco Mexico, to Warrensburg, Missouri, USA, pretty harsh change if any of you know Guadalajara and Warrensburg, or let alone, Mexico and the US.
Warrensburg is a small town in Missouri, just a little South-east of Kansas City, it's about 1 -1 & 1/2 hour drive to KC, and about 5 hours to St. Louis in the west.
Ok, I've had so little time, what with fixing up my apartment, my social security number, my classes (the ones I'm giving AND the ones I'm taking), and with getting to know Central Missouri State University (from now on referred to as "CMSU").
The city is nice and quite tranquil, only 15,000 people live here and it almost doubles with all the students coming to study here. There's nothing much to do really, every night out starts at Pine St. Either, that's where most, if not all, the bars are. A night out could start in "Garrison's" or "Fidder's" which look like the most popular places, those AND Wal-Mart.
The parties are very "American" lots of beer and mixing with other drinks, most of the time people bring their own drinks, which is actually better, but the host still has to clean up afterwards. Simply put, they enormous, probably too big for this town, too big for me no doubt, by 2 in the morning I've had more than enough of the crowed and prefer to go home and sleep.
After 1:30, that 3rd call and they kick you out, there is always a party around somewhere, either at one of the dorms, or at ones unsuspecting apartment, which he'll inevitably permit, what with all the people around and not wanting to be an asshole.
Now, the classes I'm taking are American Literature to 1865, that's an American Culture class I had to take, but it's actually looking pretty interesting, my other class is Historical Archaeology, that on looks interesting, we'll see how that goes.
So today I taught my first two classes, to two groups of 30 people; by Friday I'm sure that number will go down dramatically, it'll probably be a huge bummer for my ego, but, it'll make the semester a lot more easier.
You can immediately figure out which are gonna be "the problem students", kids who actually know more than they should for that class, which they actually shouldn't take, because, even after my warning, they will not get credit for that class if they have more than 3 years of Spanish, prior, to this class. Basically, those kids want an easy grade. I have to kick those people out of my class.
My first class, 9:00am, was a bit complicated, I should've been more prepared, it went well, but it could've gone better, and I really thought it was gonna go worse. I went on for the full 50 minutes, which I probably shouldn't have, just because it was the first class, I should've given the kids a break. Thankfully, after that class, I managed to sneak in another 1601 Spanish class, where I got some pointers form a fellow teacher. So my 11:00 am class went on a lot more smoothly and, I think, the kids enjoyed it a lot more.
everything's cool, the weather is a bit hot and humid, but it'll get colder than anything I've experienced, which is weird because, believe it or not, I'm actually looking forward to that. I cant wait for it to snow.
That's it for now, I'' try to post more as I go, I'm sorry for anyone who actually was a daily reader of my blog, I'll get up to date. Thanks
Cheers
Warrensburg is a small town in Missouri, just a little South-east of Kansas City, it's about 1 -1 & 1/2 hour drive to KC, and about 5 hours to St. Louis in the west.
Ok, I've had so little time, what with fixing up my apartment, my social security number, my classes (the ones I'm giving AND the ones I'm taking), and with getting to know Central Missouri State University (from now on referred to as "CMSU").
The city is nice and quite tranquil, only 15,000 people live here and it almost doubles with all the students coming to study here. There's nothing much to do really, every night out starts at Pine St. Either, that's where most, if not all, the bars are. A night out could start in "Garrison's" or "Fidder's" which look like the most popular places, those AND Wal-Mart.
The parties are very "American" lots of beer and mixing with other drinks, most of the time people bring their own drinks, which is actually better, but the host still has to clean up afterwards. Simply put, they enormous, probably too big for this town, too big for me no doubt, by 2 in the morning I've had more than enough of the crowed and prefer to go home and sleep.
After 1:30, that 3rd call and they kick you out, there is always a party around somewhere, either at one of the dorms, or at ones unsuspecting apartment, which he'll inevitably permit, what with all the people around and not wanting to be an asshole.
Now, the classes I'm taking are American Literature to 1865, that's an American Culture class I had to take, but it's actually looking pretty interesting, my other class is Historical Archaeology, that on looks interesting, we'll see how that goes.
So today I taught my first two classes, to two groups of 30 people; by Friday I'm sure that number will go down dramatically, it'll probably be a huge bummer for my ego, but, it'll make the semester a lot more easier.
You can immediately figure out which are gonna be "the problem students", kids who actually know more than they should for that class, which they actually shouldn't take, because, even after my warning, they will not get credit for that class if they have more than 3 years of Spanish, prior, to this class. Basically, those kids want an easy grade. I have to kick those people out of my class.
My first class, 9:00am, was a bit complicated, I should've been more prepared, it went well, but it could've gone better, and I really thought it was gonna go worse. I went on for the full 50 minutes, which I probably shouldn't have, just because it was the first class, I should've given the kids a break. Thankfully, after that class, I managed to sneak in another 1601 Spanish class, where I got some pointers form a fellow teacher. So my 11:00 am class went on a lot more smoothly and, I think, the kids enjoyed it a lot more.
everything's cool, the weather is a bit hot and humid, but it'll get colder than anything I've experienced, which is weird because, believe it or not, I'm actually looking forward to that. I cant wait for it to snow.
That's it for now, I'' try to post more as I go, I'm sorry for anyone who actually was a daily reader of my blog, I'll get up to date. Thanks
Cheers
Posted at
at
5:07 PM
on
August 25, 2004
by
Posted by
Jose
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Well, I've been out for a long time now, about 10 days with a whole lot to say, mostly why I haven't posted enough updates recently.
The thing is, I'm moving to Missouri next Thursday (the 12th), I'm going to give Spanish classes as an Intern Teacher at CMSU (central Missouri State University) for the whole school year, so, coming this Thursday, I'll be living the "American Way of Life."
I'm excited, yet a bit frightened, I know half of the fear is in the anticipation of something, so I'm swallowing all the fear and just letting this happen. The truth is, I want it to start already.
I got this gig through an Intercultural exchange program called "Amity", which interviews prospects to teach they native language in the United States, it offers them a Host Family and a small stipend so, basically, one needs money for his own little spendings, since you're not paying for food nor housing. Anyone interested should check the webpage out.
So I start off next Monday with orientation, that'll be from the 16th, up to the 22th, I think, they'll be showing us how CMSU works, how they would like us to work , all that stuff.
I'm gonna have to get used to a lot of things, what with the differences between Mexican an American culture, I've lived near the border most of my life, but to say that life in El Paso TX, is completely American, is way off. For starters, Mexicans are a bit more liberal, Sexual Harassment is not a big thing here, and stares, comments and such, are much more tolerated here than they are up north.
I have no problem with the food, it will actually be good to me since I need to gain a few kilograms to get to my ideal weight. Other than that, everything should be ok.
I'll be living in a small town called Warrensburg, it only has a population of about 15,000, of which 10,000 are students at CMSU, so the atmosphere should be interesting.
I'll be turning this weblog into a sort of online journal on my experiences over there, whoever reads this will probably see a change, cutting down a little on poetry and seeing more free writes, it'll probably get more interesting.
Anyways, let's this over with, two more days and I'll be outta here, wish me luck people.
Posted at
at
11:16 PM
on
August 09, 2004
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Posted by
Jose
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