Floating

   Things change a lot faster than one can understand. Seconds fly by too quickly and one's thoughts are still left behind the moment that person is living. Caught in the past; caught in some other place, caught with another person.

   I try to convince myself the world is still spinning; people still talk to each other in the same language I speak while I find it difficult to even understand myself.

   My beliefs have changed; my views are those I once considered wrong. Yes, I have changed; yes I am another person, who exactly I don't know but I'm liking the person I'm becoming.

   Things still remain from who I used to be, memories mostly that I do not intend to leave behind or forget, whether for right or wrong those memories, those past lives, have brought me where I am now taking the most difficult decision I've taken probably in all my life. There's always one of those every certain amount of years in someone's life.

   But right now I'm floating, I'm somewhere I do not know perfectly but I's a place I'm getting to know. Soon the palm of my hand will resemble where I want to be, I'll know it by heart, and I'll actually KNOW my heart.

   I miss the company though, I can't deny that. She's on my mind frequently, more than I should be admitting and she's a subject of discussion among the people that surround me, which makes it a bit more complicated for me to try and focus on other things. But, the truth is, most of the times I prefer to keep my mind occupied with her. I can't help but smile while remembering the good times.

   Still, I'm floating somewhere and I want to stay there waiting and searching, possibilities will come and go, flights will take me places, highways will make me see things I havent yet still I want to see her. I'll probably will run into her somewhere in a year or in thirty, at least I can hope our memories of each other will be fond ones; I can hope I'm not remembered as someone who cracked her ideology or ruined her recently found independece.

   She deserves as much as me to see things without the interpretation of another pair of eyes; without the guise of anothers opinion; of anothers hurry to leave or hesitation to speak. This way one speaks without a response; without someone else telling how utterly wrong that is. Justify to no one, correspond only to ones self. Finally.

So I{m floating and Ill be staying here for a while. Its comfortable.