I'm about take the most important and difficult decision in my life...

What should I do? Should I call her or keep my silence? Will she still trust me and am I still trustworthy? It will be another two years by myself and miserable or look for her in someone else's eyes.

I know I wont find anyone quite like her...

Why now? Why so close to my departing date?

GOD DAMMIT, WHY???!!!!