At Least This Much

   I wont say "She let me go away," or "She never took advantage of me,." We both made our mistakes; we both know where we went wrong, whether we admit it or not, that's another story.

   I don't like placing fault in situations where more than one person is involved. After a breakup, one slowly realizes what he or she did wrong, but it's only after time, it never just hits you suddenly, instead you slowly comes to terms with the mistakes and bad decisions and that is when one learns, one grows up.

   I've made my mistakes, but It's alright. There have been very long and very lonely nights, but I'm still here and I know the mistakes I made, they're written down with red ink my notebook somewhere in the last few pages and I come across them every now and then when I open it (I have something pasted on that page that makes the notebook almost open in that page by itself.)

   I wont say I hate her for what happened, I'd have to hate myself, but I've done that for far too long. I whipped myself constantly this past couple of years because of the mistakes I constantly made, because of what I was constantly denied and I THOUGHT I deserved. That is what I believe, it doesn't necessarily mean it's correct.

   I'll come back later....