She looks great and, as difficult as it might seem she has changed in these past three weeks. She finally pierced her nose, something she's been wanting to do for months but for some reason or the other she never did it; she dyed her hair red again after a malfunction turned her hair a very sexy jet black. She never liked that color anyway.

She called me to tell me she had things to give me back; things she didn't want anymore; things she didn't need. So I went to her house and she came out with a box in her arms, she gave it to me, I mentioned her new piercing and different hair, I said I was sorry again and she said she was as well. I left. Not even 5 minutes passed and I was back on my way home. I didn't want any trouble; I didn't want to have an argument.

I did not notice until I got home what the box actually had inside, it was all the things I gave her in the last 3 years; pictures, letters, small details, things we'd buy; everything was in that box, neatly organized and packed. I called her telling her these things weren't mine, that I had given them to her, she replied saying that having those things hurt her and that I can do whatever I want with them, including throwing them away since I'm so good at doing that.

I could tell she was still mad, she had something in her eyes I cant quite explain, but that's nothing new though, I could never really read her so I cant really be sure what in the world she was feeling when she saw me earlier today. Probably just complete indifference; probably uncontrollable hate; maybe nothing.

"But please, remember me
Fondly
I heard from someone you're still pretty
And then they went on to say
That the pearly gates
Had some eloquent graffiti
Like 'We'll meet again'
And 'Fuck the man'
And 'Tell my mother not to worry'
And angels with their gray
Handshakes were always done
in such a hurry."

It's amazing how a person is willing to throw away great memories because of someone else's incapacity to keep moving on but, then again, I guess I did the same. It pains me that this is over but I felt I could keep going much further before something worse happened. I know for a fact that I would cheated on her, but I haven't still.

The truth is I'd only seen her once before as passionate about our relationship as when I broke up with her, and that was when it all of this began. It surprised me to see her say all those things she did that day trying to convince me, she's not one to implore or beg but that's the closest she ever gone. If only it were like that.

She can think what she wants though, I don't have the right to give her my opinion on what's right or wrong anymore, just like with this things she gave me back, I have no room for them here but I cant force her to take them back. She probably thinks I'm fine with it; that I've thrown away all of her stuff away. So wrong. I haven't thrown anything away.

And I don't think I will. I'm sorry